Day 4
Today started out as a mildly productive day with another day of tackling the horrendous mess that is a the backroom. This is a room that has become home to all of my sisters belongings once she left college and moved to New York, all of my belongings from every countless move I did in Seattle, alongside the things from our childhood, blankets that have no room anywhere else, pillows, and other various odds and ins. I made an impressive dent on it today which made me happy, and I was motivated to do more until I began getting the shakes from too much caffeine and not enough food.
To remedy that, today's snack/lunch was 6 slices of green bell pepper to be dipped in 1 oz. of cream cheese, and 6 pieces of celery with almond butter slathered on top. It was only partly filling.
After that I lost all motivation, and from then on my mental state started to decline. Michiel came home late in the afternoon and immediately set to task to make mushroom soup. He finished just as my mom got home from work and my mom and I paired that with salads, while Michiel made chicken. It was delicious. We FaceTimed my sis and talked about her work, Michiel and I played that new video game. It was all fine. But I started feeling intensely hungry... that's not the right word. I had such an intense craving for sugar but it couldn't be filled so it just felt like this emptiness inside me.
On top of that, the low sugar levels (or hell, maybe low nutrient levels all around, who knows at this point) left me feeling incapable of communicating with my sister and fuzzy in the head. My mood declined significantly after this. All I could think was that soon I'll be waking up to go workout, which will fill me with anxiety, and then I'll repeat the same day over again. Nibbling on the little that this diet allows, and what my own dietary restrictions allow, and feeling this insatiable hunger for sugar. I thought maybe I'll make Denisse and Michiel come to Seattle with me to go see Nour. But then I remembered, we couldn't eat out in Seattle. We could drink but only straight whiskey or vodka. It would be the same unsatisfactory meals and drinks with no ability to satiate it, just out of the house rather than inside it.
I began to think, is it even living to live without chocolate or carbs? Without my favorite Dutch delicacy peanut butter and chocolate sprinkles on toast? Without fun cocktails and french fries?
God my mouth is watering and my stomach is grumbling thinking about it.
I mentioned this all to Michiel and he immediately conceded. It's not living our usual lives, he said. But... our way of living got us to where we are now. A little overweight, a little unhealthy, and a lot out of shape. We indulged a little too much this last year, so now we have to live without for a little while, but once we're done we can slowly add things back and maybe we'll find the sweet spot right in the middle.
He's got a very good point.
We talked about how once this is over, when he cooks he'll add a hell of a lot less carbs. And what's so great about this is it's allowing us to build up a repertoire of no carb recipes that we'll be able to add into our normal daily diet more often than not so we maintain the glorious physique we are bound to get with this restrictive challenge.
I can't say it lightened my mood immensely- my stomach is still growling, my mouth still watering, my anxiety still building knowing that the closer it is to the time I sleep, the closer I am to waking up and going to workout- but it did make life a little more bearable for the time being.
~
The Day 4 Challenge:
Day 4 Meals:
To remedy that, today's snack/lunch was 6 slices of green bell pepper to be dipped in 1 oz. of cream cheese, and 6 pieces of celery with almond butter slathered on top. It was only partly filling.
After that I lost all motivation, and from then on my mental state started to decline. Michiel came home late in the afternoon and immediately set to task to make mushroom soup. He finished just as my mom got home from work and my mom and I paired that with salads, while Michiel made chicken. It was delicious. We FaceTimed my sis and talked about her work, Michiel and I played that new video game. It was all fine. But I started feeling intensely hungry... that's not the right word. I had such an intense craving for sugar but it couldn't be filled so it just felt like this emptiness inside me.
On top of that, the low sugar levels (or hell, maybe low nutrient levels all around, who knows at this point) left me feeling incapable of communicating with my sister and fuzzy in the head. My mood declined significantly after this. All I could think was that soon I'll be waking up to go workout, which will fill me with anxiety, and then I'll repeat the same day over again. Nibbling on the little that this diet allows, and what my own dietary restrictions allow, and feeling this insatiable hunger for sugar. I thought maybe I'll make Denisse and Michiel come to Seattle with me to go see Nour. But then I remembered, we couldn't eat out in Seattle. We could drink but only straight whiskey or vodka. It would be the same unsatisfactory meals and drinks with no ability to satiate it, just out of the house rather than inside it.
I began to think, is it even living to live without chocolate or carbs? Without my favorite Dutch delicacy peanut butter and chocolate sprinkles on toast? Without fun cocktails and french fries?
God my mouth is watering and my stomach is grumbling thinking about it.
I mentioned this all to Michiel and he immediately conceded. It's not living our usual lives, he said. But... our way of living got us to where we are now. A little overweight, a little unhealthy, and a lot out of shape. We indulged a little too much this last year, so now we have to live without for a little while, but once we're done we can slowly add things back and maybe we'll find the sweet spot right in the middle.
He's got a very good point.
We talked about how once this is over, when he cooks he'll add a hell of a lot less carbs. And what's so great about this is it's allowing us to build up a repertoire of no carb recipes that we'll be able to add into our normal daily diet more often than not so we maintain the glorious physique we are bound to get with this restrictive challenge.
I can't say it lightened my mood immensely- my stomach is still growling, my mouth still watering, my anxiety still building knowing that the closer it is to the time I sleep, the closer I am to waking up and going to workout- but it did make life a little more bearable for the time being.
~
The Day 4 Challenge:
- Where do you actually want to go: By the end of these 6 weeks I want to have made a solid dent in my goal of losing around 40 pounds (healthily I’d hope for around 25 pounds by the end of this challenge). I want to have the recipes and know how built up to continue with the diet even after the 6 weeks have ended and only then, slowly add some of the things that I’d like back in.
- What is in the way of you getting there? What is the obstacle you are facing moving forward: To get there I need to keep doing what I’m doing and not let fear or temptation move me off track. The obstacles I see moving forward will be socializing and going out with friends, and finding ways to stick to the diet while doing that. Additionally, keeping up the motivation and making sure that always overrides the anxieties surrounding working out.
Day 4 Meals:
- breakfast: 2 poached eggs and half an avocado
- lunch: 6 slices of green bell pepper with 1 oz. cream cheese, and 6 pieces of celery with 1.5 tbsp almond butter
- dinner: mushroom soup and mixed baby spring greens salad with radishes and bell peppers
- snack: 1 oz. cheddar cheese
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